Текст песни: Queers, The. Houston We Have A Problem.

Better get the Xanax cause I think I'm in a panic

and my brain is really getting fried

The kids are getting dumber and it's really not a stunner

cause the evidence supports my find



I mention German Measles cause my buddy's name is Weasel

and the only word I found to rhyme

Lately I've been thinking that this ain't my line of business

and I'm just about to lose my mind



I gotta tell you that the level of discourse

was pretty bad to start with and it's getting worse

Par for the course



Houston we have a problem

And we're running out of time

Houtson we have a problem

The kids are all out of their minds - 2x



I wanna tend my garden while my girlfriend wears Eve Arden

and she bitches that we got no dough

Phillip's drinking whiskey with a stripper he got frisky

picked her up and fell and broke his toe



My nerves are really shot and I've become unmanned

And now I see I'm going pale beneath my tan

Where's my Ativan?



Chorus (To be sung loudly by drunk idiots in the front low)